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I am so sorry

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Shinzo Abe
Solaris
Sven Shieldmaker
Andrezj Kolarov
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I am so sorry Empty I am so sorry

Post by Andrezj Kolarov Tue Jun 07, 2016 7:16 am

Hi,

I'll be brief, I have no doubt that the GPA now completely views me as a coward, deserter and traitor, and I won't defend myself from that because they're all true. I saw the state of my nation, my lack of resources, my lack of any tanks/aircraft/ships, and most of NK with most of it's members (and nukes) in range of me, and I panicked. I hate myself now for what I did and the shame I feel has been in my head constantly for the last few days during work, it's quite unbearable - I didn't think it was possible to get so emotional over a "game", but then I realized that it's not about the game it's the friendships, the relationships which I betrayed which is what I am guilty about, the GPA sheltered me, protected me, and I repaid that with betrayal at the very time when I could repay that kindness. I became obsessed with the "game" aspect, building my cities and infra, I became a selfish "pixel hugger". I am NOT trying to rationalize my decisions, what I did was wrong, and I'm dying of shame.

I know from the embargoes that the anger against me is real and I accept all that, I do not expect forgiveness or even acceptance, I just want to say that I am not cold and unemotional to what's been happening, I have seen the posts over on the P&W forum and how those bastards NK are trying to write this off as a joke or something, and seeing other bastards like Keegoz and other talking this this nuclear war is justified purely because the GPA wants to live in peace and hurrdurr roll neutrals, it makes me want to just explode in rage, but it also makes me feel even more ashamed that I didn't stand up and fight this evil when I had the chance!

So yeah, I didn't know where to post this but here.
Andrezj Kolarov
Andrezj Kolarov

Served as Director of Foreign Affairs
Posts : 283
Join date : 2016-01-14

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I am so sorry Empty Re: I am so sorry

Post by Sven Shieldmaker Tue Jun 07, 2016 9:12 am

I speak only for myself..."Then come home and take your lumps".
Sven Shieldmaker
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Member that volunteered to defend 3 times. :)
Successfully came to the defense of a fellow member
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I am so sorry Empty Re: I am so sorry

Post by Solaris Tue Jun 07, 2016 9:22 am

Good job, Kolarov. Maybe this would be a lesson for those who want to leave GPA during the war like spineless fools.

Help your brothers out. Do not leave the alliance just because a war is happening. Defend GPA. Defend for what you stand for.
Solaris
Solaris

I am so sorry Friend10
Served as Triumvir of Military Affairs.
Served as Director of Military Affairs.
Took part in fighting Suicide Squad raids.
Donated over 10 million to the alliance.
$12,5M and 7,500 tons so far!
Over 10,000 tons of resources donated.
Has a reputation of 30.
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Post by Shinzo Abe Tue Jun 07, 2016 9:58 am

I respect you for coming here and apologising.
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I am so sorry Member10
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I am so sorry Empty Re: I am so sorry

Post by Prezyan Tue Jun 07, 2016 11:14 am

Andrezj Kolarov wrote:I saw the state of my nation, my lack of resources, my lack of any tanks/aircraft/ships, and most of NK with most of it's members (and nukes) in range of me, and I panicked.

This is why the GPA should actively harass enforce their members to maintain a strong military.
Too bad whoever does it will get impeached and then put into probation whilst they didn't break any laws except the "spirit" of those said nonexistent laws.

...

Too soon?
Prezyan
Prezyan

Served as Director of Military Affairs in the beginning of the GPA golden age
I am so sorry Popula10
Made some nice stuff! :)
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I am so sorry Empty Re: I am so sorry

Post by Andrezj Kolarov Tue Jun 07, 2016 11:21 am

Prezyan wrote:
Andrezj Kolarov wrote:I saw the state of my nation, my lack of resources, my lack of any tanks/aircraft/ships, and most of NK with most of it's members (and nukes) in range of me, and I panicked.

This is why the GPA should actively harass enforce their members to maintain a strong military.
Too bad whoever does it will get impeached and then put into probation whilst they didn't break any laws except the "spirit" of those said nonexistent laws.

...

Too soon?
They do. I was breaking GPA rules by not keeping adequate military forces on hand, as well as selling my resource stockpiles to maintain rapid city/infra building. It's all on me I'm afraid.
Andrezj Kolarov
Andrezj Kolarov

Served as Director of Foreign Affairs
Posts : 283
Join date : 2016-01-14

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I am so sorry Empty Re: I am so sorry

Post by Optima Tue Jun 07, 2016 5:17 pm

Andrezj Kolarov wrote:
Prezyan wrote:
Andrezj Kolarov wrote:I saw the state of my nation, my lack of resources, my lack of any tanks/aircraft/ships, and most of NK with most of it's members (and nukes) in range of me, and I panicked.

This is why the GPA should actively harass enforce their members to maintain a strong military.
Too bad whoever does it will get impeached and then put into probation whilst they didn't break any laws except the "spirit" of those said nonexistent laws.

...

Too soon?
They do. I was breaking GPA rules by not keeping adequate military forces on hand, as well as selling my resource stockpiles to maintain rapid city/infra building. It's all on me I'm afraid.

I'm sure this is a simple measure (I hope) which can be cleared up with a rap on the knuckles, a fine, and maybe some probation. Contingent on your achieving and maintaining specified military levels. I'm not government, so I can't guarantee you anything, but past repercussions for the same exact actions, have been fair and amicable to both sides.

Come home, lets make this right.
Optima
Optima

I am so sorry Friend10
Served as Triumvir of Military Affairs
Successfully came to the defense of a fellow member
Successfully coordinated a defense
Survived the St-Patrick Massacre
Fought in the Anti Suicide Squad war
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Ate 5+ Nukes for the GPA
Given at least $10,000,000 to the Alliance
Given at least 100,000 Tons of food to the Alliance
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Post by kalev60 Wed Jun 08, 2016 11:25 am

I really believe in second changes if people to whom they are given are worth it. So I have no strong feelings here.
I also don't believe in poaching so I'm not going to ask you to come back as some already have here, but I'm speaking for myself here so: I don't see no reasons in the future if you wish to return to make that impossible for you.
kalev60
kalev60

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Created at least 1 guide
 Survived the St-Patrick Massacre
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Took part in the Alpha or Beta test
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Ate 5+ Nukes for the GPA
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I am so sorry Patric10_Copy_Copy_Copy_5_Copy_Copy
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I am so sorry Empty Re: I am so sorry

Post by Gills Wed Jun 08, 2016 12:06 pm

Prezyan wrote:
Andrezj Kolarov wrote:I saw the state of my nation, my lack of resources, my lack of any tanks/aircraft/ships, and most of NK with most of it's members (and nukes) in range of me, and I panicked.

This is why the GPA should actively harass enforce their members to maintain a strong military.
Too bad whoever does it will get impeached and then put into probation whilst they didn't break any laws except the "spirit" of those said nonexistent laws.

...

Too soon?

Funny thing is that the person who started the whole impeachment things is now gone. It's okay Andrezj, you apologized. I'm more bothered by those who leave and never say anything about that.
Gills
Gills

Member of the GPA
Served as Director of Foreign Affairs
Diplomat in Foreign Alliances
Served as a Sentinel
Veteran of the Green Winter War
Veteran of the Bizarre War
Ate a rogue nuke for the GPA
Ate 5+ Nukes for the GPA
Combat experience 9: First Sergeant (1SG)
Posts : 291
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Post by Andrezj Kolarov Thu Jun 30, 2016 3:10 pm

kalev60 wrote:I really believe in second changes if people to whom they are given are worth it. So I have no strong feelings here.
I also don't believe in poaching so I'm not going to ask you to come back as some already have here, but I'm speaking for myself here so: I don't see no reasons in the future if you wish to return to make that impossible for you.
Would you mind if I applied to return to GPA?
Andrezj Kolarov
Andrezj Kolarov

Served as Director of Foreign Affairs
Posts : 283
Join date : 2016-01-14

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